Kalmia Records Blog

Yes, that’s me up there! Interestingly enough, I used to be deathly afraid of heights. I’m not suggesting para sailing is the best way to overcome a fear of heights but it worked for me. Sometimes, the only way through a fear is to meet it head on. That’s what I did in this case.

My wife, Georgia, and I were vacationing on Marco Island, Florida several years ago and I was sitting on the beach watching people flying in parachutes over the water. I thought to myself, “That looks like a lot of fun.” Then, the little voice inside reminded me that I had a lifelong fear of unsecured heights. Sure, I was fine in airplanes but to hang out in a parachute was more than I could imagine.

After a few days of anxiously watching people having fun I decided to face one of my worst fears. I walked over to the man at the rental booth and asked him if it was safe to do this. Dumb question. Like he was going to say no:-) He said, “It’s so safe we have young children doing it and I even have an 80 year old woman who comes every few weeks to do it. What a closer:-) Now, what am I supposed to say? That this big macho guy is too scared to do it? No way! I said sure and paid the man.

I will admit that I was frightened half to death when I got up there. I figured since I was a good swimmer I would not worry. Once I saw how high I was going, I realized it did not matter. If I fell, I would splatter - good swimmer or not.

After a while, I loosened my painfully tight grip on the parachute lines and actually began to enjoy the ride. What a sight from several hundred feet above the island. By the time I got back down, I had next to no fear of high places.

Sometimes we just have to look our fears right in the eye and do it anyway.

© 2004 Jim Donovan PO Box 1147, Buckingham, PA 18912 (215) 794-3826

Jim Donovan is the author of “Handbook to a Happier Life, a motivational speaker and coach. For a no cost bonus product & more, visit http://www.JimDonovan.com

If you had all the information and tools you needed to live your dream life, would you use them? Yes?
Click here ==> http://www.jimdonovan.com/ebookoffer.html

There is someone calling to you right now - who is it?

It’s the person you want to become. Who is that person? Is this person happier? Wealthier? Thinner? More energetic? More powerful? Whoever this person is, this person is inside you. This person IS you.

What prevents you from becoming this person?

I once knew a young man who wanted to become an actor. He studied acting and participated in many plays at his college and in his community. A director recommended that he study dance, so he did. He even took voice lessons.

Today, he still lives in his hometown. He’s married and has two kids. He frequently says “You know, I could have been an actor.” When asked why he didn’t pursue his acting career, he shrugs and says it just wasn’t practical. Besides, it’s too late now.

One day, his wife decided to push him on the topic. He explained that in order to pursue acting, he’d need to relocate to a big city, like New York, Los Angeles, or Chicago, and that just wasn’t practical.

“Even though it wasn’t practical, why didn’t you do it anyway?” his wife pushed.

“Because I wanted to marry you,” he said, teasingly, trying to get her off the topic.

“You don’t think I would have moved to a big city with you?” she asked. “Did you even ask me?”

“Well, I didn’t have a job lined up. Besides, what would I do in a big city? I wouldn’t know anyone. And it’s not that easy to break into acting. There are a million starving actors waiting tables in big cities.”

“But you wouldn’t have starved if I were working,” she persisted.

After more conversation along this line, he finally admitted the truth. He was terrified of failure. All through high school and college, everyone assured him that he had the makings of a great actor. What would they think if he failed? What would he think of himself? It was just easier to let everyone think (including himself) that he chose love over fortune.

He had never admitted his fear of failure to anyone before. Naming this fear made it seem less threatening, and even a little ridiculous. He wondered why he had let his fear of what other people might think deter him from following his passion.

He now says that if he had been more honest with himself, he may have been able to face his fears. He may not have become the great actor everyone had predicted, but he would have had a chance to follow his passion.

If you can name the fear, you can face it.

Sometimes you have to ask yourself tough questions to get there. When you ask yourself “What’s holding me back?”, don’t settle for answers like “I don’t have enough time” or “I don’t have enough money,” or “It’s not practical.” Press yourself until you discover the real reason.

When you discover the true reason for holding yourself back, you can address it and even move past it, if you choose.

Holly Zenith started out as something lower than a file clerk, and then launched the career of her dreams. She recently authored “Emerging From the Pink Collar Ghetto,” which you can learn more about here: http://hollyzenith.com/Resources/PCG/pcgad.html

“You can’t get anywhere in anything without work, action, movement..whatever you want to call it.” Scott Haines

Just getting on with doing something however poorly is important. Mike Litman talks about how you can upgrade your conversation if you just get on with things by taking action.

He uses the example of one man or woman talking about getting a website up. He or she talks for 6 months. This is boring!

Another man or woman takes speedy action and gets his or her website up in one week. It is not perfect but he or she can now move on. They are no longer talking about putting up the website. They are talking about bringing in traffic. This is exciting! They have moved on but can still improve their website as they go. They have moved from being nervous about putting up their website to being excited about it.

Another person might dither about starting an ezine. Another just starts one. She might lose many subscribers as she goes but at least her ezine is improving and more and more subscribers stay on. Her talk is full of excitement and enthusiasm.

Someone talks about writing a book. Another one just starts writing every day and gets on with it. His or her book may not be great but it can be improved. The talk is no longer about writing a book; it is about improving a book and selling it!

About 15 years ago, I took action to open a martial arts school instead of just talking about it. I didn’t feel too confident and my first lesson opened with just one student coming through the door. My marketing had been practically non-existent. However, things soon improved.

Two years later the class was thriving. If you are interested, check out the photo on the home page of my self-defence site.
The URL for this is listed below. The photo on the right is of my class in 1992, about two years after the one student had appeared. The school is still going strong in 2005.

Eva Gregory has written a great quote:

“Inspired action is the difference in potential and actuality.”

However, sometimes uninspired action is also the difference. We cannot always afford to wait for inspiration. Inspiration often arrives after we have started. If a thing is worth doing it is worth doing badly at first and improving later.

This is the basic principle behind brainstorming. Early criticism kills a creative discussion. Early criticism can stop creative action in its tracks.

Of course, it helps, to plan and learn the necessary skills but if you wait too long for these your project will die. Action, movement and work are essential.

Above all, if you take action on things, you will live an exciting although not necessarily a comfortable life!

Resource box

John Watson is an award winning teacher and martial arts instructor. He has recently written two books about achieving your goals and dreams. They can both be found on his website http://www.motivationtoday.com along with a daily motivational message.

The title of the first book is “36 Laws To Ignite Your Inner Power And Realize Your Dreams Now!” The book can be found at this URL http://www.motivationtoday.com/36_laws.php

You are welcome to publish the article above in your ezine so long as you do not alter it and keep the resource box as it is.
The URL for my self-defence site mentioned in the article is:
http://www.self-defence.org

One day, a young man was cleaning out his late grandfather’s belongings when he came across a bright red envelope. Written on the front were the words, “To my grandson.” Recognizing his grandfather’s writing, the boy opened the envelope. A letter inside read:

Dear Grandson,

Years ago you came to me for help. You said, “Grandpa, how is it that you’ve accomplished so much in your life? You’re still full of energy, and I’m already tired of struggling. How can I get that same enthusiasm that you’ve got?”

I didn’t know what to say to you then. But knowing my days are numbered, I figure that I owe you an answer. So here is what I believe.

I think a lot of it has to do with how a person looks at things. I call it ‘keeping your eyes wide open.’

First, realize that life is filled with surprises, but many are good ones. If you don’t keep watching for them, you’ll miss half the excitement. Expect to be thrilled once in a while, and you will be.

When you meet up with challenges, welcome them. They’ll leave you wiser, stronger, and more capable than you were the day before. When you make a mistake, be grateful for the things it taught you. Resolve to use that lesson to help you reach your goals.

And always follow the rules even the little ones. When you follow the rules, life works. If you think you ever really get by with breaking the rules, you’re only fooling yourself.

It’s also important to decide exactly what you want. Then keep your mind focused on it, and be prepared to receive it.

But be ready to end up in some new places too. As you grow with the years, you’ll be given bigger shoes to fill. So be ready for endings as well as challenging beginnings.

Sometimes we have to be brave enough to move from the familiar to the unfamiliar. Life isn’t just reaching peaks. Part of it is moving from one peak to the next. If you rest too long in between, you might be tempted to quit. Leave the past in the past. Climb the next mountain and enjoy the view.

Dump things that weigh you down emotionally and spiritually. When an old resentment, belief or attitude becomes heavy, lighten your load. Shed those hurtful attitudes that slow you down and drain your energy.

Remember that your choices will create your successes and your failures. So consider all the pathways ahead and decide which ones to follow. Then believe in yourself, get up, and get going.

And be sure to take breaks once in a while. They’ll give you a renewed commitment to your dreams and a cheerful, healthy perception of the things that matter the most to you.

Most important of all, never give up on yourself. The person who ends up a winner is the one who resolves to win. Give life everything you’ve got, and life will give it’s best back to you.

Love always,
Grandpa

© Copyright by Steve Brunkhorst. Steve is a professional life success coach, motivational author, and the editor of Achieve! 60-Second Nuggets of Inspiration, a popular mini-zine bringing great stories, motivational nuggets, and inspiring thoughts to help you achieve more in your career and personal life. Get the next issue by visiting http://www.AchieveEzine.com